Wednesday, 6 January 2016

Happy

كثيرا ما نبحث عن السعادة في نزهة...في فيلم...في جلسة... كثيرا ما ننتظر حدثا كي نفرح...ننتظر ولدا كي نظفر...ننتظر مالا كي نشتري... نحن البشر...لا يعجبنا العجب...نظل نتلفت حولنا على ما أنعم الله على غيرنا...ننظر و نتمنى... نمضي وقتنا نتحسر على ماضينا...نقلق من مستقبلنا...و نتوه في بحر من الحزن على ما خسرناه...و ما لم نملك أبدا... نبحث في أعماقنا عن ما يسعدنا...نبحث عن معنى السعادة...نبحث عن أسباب السعادة... لنقف قليلا و ننظر الى أنفسنا. لماذا نضيع وقتنا بهذه الأشياء؟ لماذا نضيع في شبر ماء؟ لماذا نبحث عن السعادة؟ لماذا لا نبيع نحن السعادة؟ لماذا لا نعد النعم التى نملكها؟ لماذا لا نتأمل الآن؟ نعيش اللحظة...نستمتع...نفرح...نسعد.. نحن نلتهي بالبحث عن ما لا نملك...بدل أن نستمتع بما نملك! الأعزب يريد أن يتزوج... المتزوج يريد أن يرزق بولد... الأم تريد أن تسعد ببعض الوقت لنفسها، لتنفس عن ضغط الأمومة... المريض يريد أن يشفى... المعافى يريد أن يلهو... الكبير بالسن يتمنى لو يرجع الى الشباب... و الشاب يتمنى لو بقي طفلا... و القلب يهوى و يتمنى... و يفعل الله ما يريد! بحكمة منه... يبلي و يعين! بعلم مسبق منه... ينتظر من سيشكر...و من سيكفر! برحمة منه... يجزي الصابر بالأجر...و الشاكر بالمزيد! الدنيا دار بلاء... ملعونة! و ملعون ما فيها...الا ذكر الله. فبدل أن ننتظر ما تقر به أعيننا...و نتحسر ان لم يأت الينا... دعونا نكن من الصابرين على النقم...من الشاكرين على النعم...من الذاكرين الله كثيرا والذاكرات... دعونا نسلم أمورنا لله وحده...و ندع القلق و الحزن...نتوكل على الله و نثق انه...بحكمة منه، و رحمة منه...سوف يعيننا ان دعوناه بقلب صادق تقي...فإن الله لا يستجيب لدعاء من قلب غافل لاه! بقلم ساجدة حداد

Friday, 1 January 2016

Happiness

I just wanted to express how happy i am. With my husband. My son. My family. My friends.
Life doesnt always go as u wish. But if u r true to god & to urself, everything will fall into place, & in the midst of all the chaos & life problems (whether they r financial or health problems or anything else), i find myself surrounded by people who love me for who i am, people who actually care abt me, like my dad & mom, my sisters (my brothers care but they rarely show it...boys), my husband, my son, my in laws, my bffs zizi & manal. Im truly gifted in many ways.
This life is full of hardships. On this earth we r subjected to a series of tests, one after the other...and we need to, no matter what, stay standing.
Sometimes we grow weak...sometimes we go bitter...sometimes we feel negative feelings. But what matters is that we dont stay that way. We find the positive in every negative situation & know that life is meant to b hard cz it aint heaven!

Tuesday, 29 December 2015

Stability

What is mental stability?
What is emotional stability?
What is stability at all?
To b stable is to have balance.
Its to not let outside problwms affect u.
What abt the inside?
Dont u ever go thru those days where u feel everything goes wrong? Dont u feel like sometimes the tiniest things can ruin ur mood? Doesnt it sometimes feel like u have no control over ur emotions? Dont u ever feel insane? So stressed ur on and on talking to urself...or bipolar? Happy this moment & miserable the next.
Its so exhausting. It happens to me every once in a while. Suddenly i hate myself, i feel like i need someone to talk to but i also feel like nobody cares. It all goes down to 1 thing: routine. Being in a rut is a mood killer, it kills everything sweet and dandy actually. When nothing new & exciting is happening to u, how can u feel excited. I feel drunk now. So tired. Exhausted. Tired of changing myself. Tired of doing a diet for 10 months and getting stuck. Theres a burning in my heart. Theres a yearning to my soul. I dont know where to start. To get closer to my goal.

Saturday, 21 November 2015

Expressing emotion

Children know not how to express themselves...so they cry. They cry for attention, they cry for help, and sometimes, they cry because they r hurting and they dont know y. The thing in common between us adults and children is emotion. We feel the same basic emotions as children. Joy, excitement, pain, fear,...etc. Upon birth, babies express their wants and needs with the only way they know...crying. As the baby becomes more & more aware of his/her surroundings, he/she begins to experience joy. Smiling is followed by laughter, and the crying begins to differentiate into different tones, based on the type of need. When a child first learns to speak, he/she tries to translate needs and wants into words. When wishes r not fulfilled, the toddler learns to create tantrums. The more the tantrums r effective, the more they r used. Children express themselves freely, no shame or social pressure. As the child gets older, and in introduced to the world of right and wrong, some of these wants cannot b fulfilled, and thus some emotions must b masked. As a child turns into a teenager, new feelings r introduced, new emotions, new wants, new needs...and thus teenagers become masters in masking emotions, or overexpressing them. Teenagers have no idea what they r feeling, and so dont know exactly how to express their wants and needs. Some become aggressive, others bashful. And depending on the reactions of their surroundings, this phase is either short if surroundings r healthy and emotions r dealt with well, or may become permanent if handled drastically. As teenagers emerge into adults, they enter a whole new world of responsibility, a whole new collection of emotions. They become more and more afraid. They must solve problems on their own. They must b mature. The pressure is enough to make someone burst. But no. They must b strong. So they mask their fear. They mask sadness. All negative emotiobs must b put away. Only joy and courage can surface. So if u break it down, from infancy to adulthood, we experience the same basic emotions: joy, fear, sadness,... but sometimes we misunderstand how we feel. Sometimes we mask our emotions. But when we look at an infant, we smile bcz we see innocence. We see a life form that hasnt been tampered with yet. We see pure emotion, though misexpressed. We see real laughs for little things. We see shrieks for other things. We look at a child and see the child within each and every one of us, dreading to b free. Free to express our emotions. Free to feel.

Thursday, 29 October 2015

Democracy or not?!

Today another kid hit my son for the first time. My son is 8 months old, and being premature & the 1st kid and all, me & my husband are very cautious of him. But today, it was a really funny scene & rewinding it in my head, it made me really proud of my son. All my life, i was a shy girl. I was bullied both verbally and physically until the age of 12. Thats bcz my parents never put me out there. They never encouraged me to defend myself. They always told me to tattle-tale when someone hurts me. I wanna be different. Bcz i know one thing. Kids dont know democracy. Adults dont know democracy. But in kids world, its a jungle & its not run by logic & reason. To gain peace, u must make war. If someone hits u, u must hit back. If someone insults u, u must hit back harder...put a sock in their mouth. Then when u hit puberty, u can try a bit of democracy...see if someone listens. So the story goes like this: My frnd visited me today and brought along her 18 month old son. At first he was shy, and enjoying looking at my son. 15 minutes later, he slaps my son on the forehead and tries to push him off his chair. Of course, my frnd was like "no! Let go of him! U cant have his toy chair...etc". But i was more interested in my sons response. I honestly expected him to cry. But guess what he did? He looked at the kid in shock, like "what the hell?!" And then reached out to the other kids hand and started hitting it until the other kid let go of the chair. My frnds son did try to attack again 10 minutes later but this time his mom pulled him away. But what happened, my son defending himself. I was so proud. I see kids being bullied in school corners and , although im an adult, im too scared to say anything. But my son. I dont have to be worried of him being bullied at school i guess.

Saturday, 24 October 2015

Simple or complicated?

Some say life is simple but we are complicated. Others say life itself is complicated. I say it depends on our perspective. Sometimes it's the way we look at a problem that makes it so complex when actually it's really simple. For example, love. When there's trouble in paradise, we say love is complicated. When really it's not! In love, you need to have a foundation based on trust and respect. Everything built above that is sturdy. Whether it's love between couples or siblings or parents & children, they all have the same concept. So if there is no trust or respect, the relationship gets complicated and eventually damaged. There are some things in life that are complicated, like poverty, politics, war,... It's things beyond our control or understanding that become complicated. Bottom line, it's a matter of perspective. When you understand how something works, you find it simple. Otherwise, it's complicated. Like for me love is simple but politics isn't. That's bcz i dont know the 1st thing about politics. Someone who knows well about politics may find it very simple and easy to explain. So word of advice. If you find something complicated & it bothers you to be that way, try to understand it. It helps. A lot.

Thursday, 22 October 2015

The truth about motherhood

You know. Its really hard being a mom. I cant go anywhere bcz he's a handful if i wanna take him with me & a liability if i wanna find someone to babysit him. Shopping must be planned a month in advance. Going out with frnz is extremely rare. I cant do anything. My time must be programmed according to my 8 month old son's needs. I dont get enough sleep bcz when my son is asleep, im either doing housework or having some quiet time with my husband without my sons constant nagging. Im tired all the time. Sometimes i forget to brush my hair...& brushing my teeth: Ancient history! Dont get me wrong, i love my son. Its just that sometimes i wish i never had him. Other times i feel like beating the living shit out of him (not that i would ever lay a finger on him but the stress headaches he is giving me r doing me wonders). Its just that i only have one son, and already i feel tied up & drained out. What would happen if i had a second? Or a third? Thank god for that c-section or i wouldnt get a break! But then on the bright side, i feel lucky cz some people dream of having kids. Just like single people get depressed cz they dont have a man & then get shocked when they discover what marriage is really like. I guess nobody is really happy. Cz we all want what we cant have, and once we have it we wish we didnt: single girls want a man, childless women want a baby, mothers want freedom, etc...wtf... C'est la vie! So enjoy life as it is & dont expect happiness to come from what u have. Happiness doesnt exist so smile for the camera & try to look legit. Just kidding. Apreciate what u have before u lose it. Be grateful for life itself & everything that comes with it. Stop thinking that the grass is greener on the other side. Its green where u water it. U may have difficulties with ur job, family, or in my case: motherhood. But in the end of the day, the smile on my sons face is worth all the trouble.